me
my life
speak to me
visit my friends
remember the past
say cheese
thanks
This is where you put all your photo links.
Like all your photo albums.
If you haven't got one and would like one,
you can use ImageStation
I am myself.
ahlay@hotmail.com.
17.
student.
i love to slp.
The way I want to be.
I'm just waiting to fly away.
Wrapped up in my cocoon.
Silently, patiently waiting.
One day I will be free.
And I will be beautiful.
And I will not be afraid to be me.
But till then, I'll wait.
星期五, 三月 25, 2005
havent been slping much for the past few days... juz slept for 3 hrs eh .. coz tmr no skool! :D... bt gotta complete my cme proj.. sad....
then for the past few days eh.. may hav been having small fights wif me... haiz... i dunno y.. everytime in class wif dia.. i feel alright.. we could tok to each other n play wif each other...going wif may out for lunch alond or wadever.. we could chat wif each other happily... bt.. every morning, every recess, everyday after skool.. when u n may meet up.. i felt tat u gals left me out.. perharps, it's me who tok to others first.. bt... i juz feel sad when everytime i see 2 of u walk away, sumtimes without telling me.. n leave me alone..[You have no idea what you do to me, and even if you did you'd probably still do it anyway]haiz.... i noe u 2 r the best of friends.. bt i juz find tat i m in a different world with u gals when the 3 of us r together... when yiling is around, at least, thr's sum1 i can tok to... she will accompany me... haiz... everytime when i going off, i will tell u gals, bt u 2 will juz say bb to me.. in a rather ignoring tone.. haiz... sumtimes when in the canteen, u 2 will go toliet or buy food.... without asking me to go along.. haiz... i noe all these things i 'complaint' abt are rather childish.. bt it really make me feel sad.. i juz couldnt be in the same world of u gals... haiz...[The world will always be cruel, but it never seems that way unless you face it alone]yesterday early in the morning, diadia told u tat i oways ask her to take bks from the locker.....sry,i did nt help dia to take the bks.... u 2 sounds lyk i purposely bully dia.. .. sry for being 4getful.. bt.. did i ever refuse to take bks when dia ask me to? haiz.. dia will oways follow may to the locker.. n sumtimes i m left alond again.. n by the time i finish taking the bks, u 2 r gone again.. sumtimes i got to catch up wif u gals... it make me feel lyk a dog looking for it's owner.. i m sry for saying tat, bt truly.. i feel tat way.... i really hope tat i wont feeling tat way in future....[A friend is someone who will walk the long way when you don't want to hop the fence but not leaving u behind the fence]haiz.. u gals say tat i m attracting attention... i admit tat i m for sumtimes.. lyk u 2 say.. unintentionally.. i feel glad u 2 noe tat i m nt attracting attntion purposely.... bt... haiz.. dia tok as if she cant stand me anymore...u gals says tat i hav change... i admit it.. my life is different from the past.. my world is nt only u gals.. bt with others in.. haiz.. mayb i m irritating sumtimes, mayb u gals cant stand me sumtimes.. bt... tat's me.. no 1 is perfect.. u gals got to accept it.. sumtimes many things u 2 did make me feel sad to being friends wif u gals.. bt i accepted it.. never complaining abt ur attitude.. i will juz bear it... although it's difficult sumtimes..[A friend is one who knows who you are, understands where you have been, accepts what you have become, and still gently allows you to grow]i noe we will qurral again when u gals read this... u both will feel tat i m telling others how poor thing i m n how bad u 2 are... tat's nt my intention.. i never wanted to put up post lyk tat... bt when today u 2 told me tat my blog is boring.. it's all abt academic... no 1 is interested to read abt tat... bt hey, it's my blog.. it's my reflection for life.. i dun need ppl to b interested in my personnal life.. i dun need it to b a 5 stars essay.. i dun need the examinors to mark my blog.. i juz need to b myself.. write wadever i lyk... i dun hav a happy family life... a hobby tat i enjoy... a luv life tat i could write down..everything tat i could say, i could write are only my friends n academic... i used to hav a comfortable friendship.. bt it doesnt seems to b now.. i hav nth to write abt...
since u 2 say my blog is boring .. i will put up sumthing tat is nt abt academic..
[Friendship opens many doors, each with a different view, but none could be more welcome than the door that leads to you]
i think.. we will qurral after i said all these.. or perharps.. things can turn out to b wat i wish.. we could tok to each other peacefully... n solve the problems.. perharps tat's wat true friends will do.. bt i think it will b never tat way among us.. unless thr's a miracle...[The best discovery true friends can make is growing up without growing apart]well..these few days i m nt feeling well.. bt i did nt tell u gals how serious it is.... i cant slp almost everynight... even i only get to slp nt more than 3 hrs per day.. i m having nightmares these few days.. n feeling giddy.. sumtimes in skool... bt i dun 1 to use it as a excuse to my faults n flaws.. n sry, for feeling tat way.. bt i cant control my feelings...i need sum1 to tok to...i need to tell others how i feel.. sry for writing all these... i juz wish u gals can understand me...[A friend is someone who can see the truth and the pain in you even when you are fooling everyone else]now.. i hav lesser time for u gals.. perharps.. i hav noe more ppl... hav more friends... bt honestly, none of them are my true friends.. i dun enjoy their accompany... i dun need them , bt i cant possibly tell them to go away.. although we seldom hav time to go out during wk ends, bt i really enjoy when we r together... i need u gals, bt i seems to b in the universe... in a different world of u gals... [Life may lead me to new and different paths, meet new friends, learn new things ... but this will remain true - wherever life takes me, I'll always remember the path where I met you]
mayb all these seems to b nth to u gals.. bt it hurts me a little by little... i feel much better now.. after saying out all these..after smsing hh.. after crying out... perharps, i m now ready to accept all these... accept wat i need to accept... i really hope we can go back to the past....[It may be difficult, it may be impossible, but that's my only request]
One day I'll fly away, leave all this to yesterday.
1:54 上午
